The is I let you down. I hurt you. I
didn’t want to, but that didn’t stop me. I never should have done it.
The truth is I panicked. I didn’t know
what to do. Commitment scares me. It makes me feel trapped.
The truth is my reasons were bull, but
I needed to say something. I needed some way to let you know. I needed some way
to make you understand… understand and hate me.
The truth is I feel awful about it. It
may not have been easy, but it has been even harder sense then. I can only
imagine how it’s been for you. You must hate me, or at least strongly dislike
me. Part of me feels that I never should have done what I did, but the same
part knows that I can’t go back. Even if I tried, it would never be the same.
The part is what made me go though with my actions. It is a part of myself that
I despise.
~
It has been said time and time again
by many a romantic that, “The truth will set you free.” I don’t agree. The
truth is a curse. It is depressing and ugly, but it is also something that must
be acknowledged. In short, the truth sucks, but it is better than living a lie.
God, I love how honest you are. I wish I could do this, wish I had the courage to just let it all out there for everyone to see, to judge. But I don't even have the courage to leave my name on this comment. I wish I could just type out all my problems and wounds for people to see...who knows, maybe you'll be my inspiration and I'll finally be able open up this bottle of emotions that I've been drowning in for the past 29 days. So I guess what I'm trying to say is thanks. Thanks for showing me that opening yourself up to people is less painful than keeping it all in.
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